Updated September 2018
Last winter I went on a deep, dark underworld journey. I had the excruciatingly beautiful experience of my identity, as I knew it, quaking, shaking and falling apart. Mythically the underworld is a place where parts of us go to die—where we are literally taken into the void and rearranged in order to emerge as a new and more whole expression. In these depths we access parts of us that were previously unconscious as we meet the dark corners of our own shadows. This particular descent was centered around my work in the world, which has been my prominent identity for most of my life.
In the depths of discomfort and despair I began to see how I was enslaved by some of my own entrenched belief systems. It was revealed to me that the way in which I was working—independently, always struggling to balance resources—time, energy and money was not serving me nor my soul’s highest expression of service. I was out of alignment with my core values around co-creation in community. In my state of utter surrender invoked by this unraveling I also began to awaken to a much bigger dream.
Currently I am living into this dream without clear answers as to what my next steps are. I am still listening and feeling my way through the dark. I share this dream as a prayer for witnessing and to ignite the call for collaboration:
I am dreaming a future of peace on earth where every human lives the full experience of embodiment realizing both the wildness of their animal bodies and the sacredness of their divinity. Where we exercise the birthrights of joy, pleasure and ecstasy that come from being fully engaged in feeling and fully alive with eros. My prayer is that every person feels their worthiness and knows exquisite self love. I have a vision where each individual knows their place of belonging here in the earth community and becomes a steward of relationship with—and thriving for—all beings. I see a future where power is rooted in collaboration, participation, personal choice and sovereignty.
My desire is to instigate radical culture change toward this vision. I know that this dream is possible because I spend large portions of my life living it and I’ve seen the change that’s possible in the incredible, courageous people I’ve had the opportunity to work with already. What is required to make this a reality for more people, is indeed radical change at a cultural level—in the ways that we relate to our bodies and minds as well as the ways in which we exercise and engage with power on all levels of society.
I have a sense that my work will remain in alignment with what I’ve been doing to some degree—transformative and experiential education that reclaims and includes the whole being—mind, body, spirit, soul, emotional intelligence and sexuality. I also know that writing is a key delivery system for me. However, I am feeling a different venue emerging (and while I have some clarity around a big vision, I am going to choose to hold that close for more cooking right now).
The underworld provided enough humility for me to know that I do not have the roadmap on how exactly to achieve this vision and to know that I cannot do this level of work as a lone entity. If the future is one of collaboration, it’s time to live this into existence now. I hear a call to birth a new phase of humanity, one that has not previously existed, and this requires a collective imagination and an abundance of shared resources.
Update September 2018:
After another year of healing, transition and soul reckoning I am now emerging with a new focus on my work, namely writing and transformative leadership development and we are in the process of expanding the vision of The Artemis School and calling in co-founders. Learn more about that here.